Some code what I really need

Good day!

I really want to have some good code for my chat.

/lol command

If someone type /lol they are getting something funny, but it should contain unlimited lols

A wrote to B topic!- system message what display at chat. (A member, B topic where the post was written)

You have recived a private message from A! A systerm message what display at chat. (A user)

/me in the middle of the text like : This is not funny, /me doesnt like it